Airline Cabin Announcements

Airline Cabin Announcements: All too rarely, airline attendants make an


effort to make the in flight 'safety lecture' and announcements a bit

more entertaining. Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported:



CONTINENTAL AIRLINES

On a Continental Flight with a very 'senior' flight attendant crew, the

pilot said, 'Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and

will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance

the appearance of your flight attendants.'





JAPANAIR LINES

'In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from

the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If

you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before

assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with more than one small child,

pick your favorite.'





BRITISH AIRWAYS

'As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings.

Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight

attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses.'





AMERICAN AIRLINES

Overheard on an American Airlines flight into Amarillo, Texas, on a

particularly windy and bumpy day: During the final approach, the Captain

was really having to fight it. After an extremely hard landing, the Flight

Attendant said, 'Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Amarillo.Please remain in

your seats with your seat belts fastened while the Captain taxis what's

left of our airplane to the gate!'





QANTAS AIRWAYS

Another flight attendant's comment on a less than perfect landing: 'We

ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroobounces us to the terminal.'





NORTHWEST AIRLINES

After a particularly rough landing during thunderstorms in Memphis,

a flight attendant on a Northwest flight announced, 'Please take care when

opening the overhead compartments because, after a landing like that, sure

as hell everything has shifted.'





PHILIPPINE AIRLINES

We're now preparing to land at San Francisco International Airport. Kindly

straighten up your seats, turn off all electronic gadgets, pull up your

window shades and buckle up for safety. We hope you enjoyed flying with us

as much as we did.



Sa wikang atin po, tayo po ay papalapag na sa paliparang pangkalawakang

internasyonal ng San

Francisco. Paalala po lamang sa ating mga kababayan --

ang mga unan, kumot, headset at iba pang kagamitan sa eroplano ay di po

kasama sa pasalubong.